Parenting and Lying

And now a tip from my upcoming book,
Parenting Success by Choosing Easiness Over Honesty

Tip #43: How to Get Rid of Complaining About Bedtime

Set a fake bedtime for your child. Make it an hour before you will lose your shit if they are not in bed, let’s say 7:30. Tell your child this “bedtime” you set, repeat it to them a lot, it will seem more official that way.

Then every night at 8:00 tell them “Oh my gosh, it is 8:00, you got to stay up a half hour past your bedtime, we better get you to sleep.”

Success.

You will be left with no complaining cause children love to think they won something, like fake “going to bed lateness.” This victory is especially awesome for them because they think not only did they win, but you lost at putting them to bed on time. Children love nothing more then you losing, but the jokes on them, cause there is something you didn’t lose. Your shit.

So they go to bed “a half hour late” wink wink, and you still have 30 minutes of not losing your shit, which I also refer to as my “half hour of eating food I just told my kid was not a healthy choice for them to eat before bedtime” time

For more tips like this, buy my non-existent book.